Talk and Cakes

Mum and Dad's neighbour has been very generously baking cakes and treats for Mum and Dad over the past few months. Quite independently this morning Dad cheekily said we were overdue a visit from the neighbour. As if by magic, she later appeared with a plate of chocolate brownies and scones. Yum. Dad has since been asleep. He has been very quiet today and only eaten the yoghurt we gave him for breakfast. He has complained more definitely of pain in his head today, so has had four spoons of morphine so far. This morning Dad was talking about 'going away' and being 'almost there' which alarmed Mum as she remembers Grandpa doing the same shortly before he died. Grandpa was lucid to the end though, whereas Dad's mental capacity is obviously impaired, so maybe he means nothing by it.

Howling wind and the killer ditch

Today has been a quiet day, apart from the wind howling down the chimney. The nurses have come and gone. Dad's shave this morning was far simpler than the other day, partly because his beard wasn't nearly so established, but also i think, because the nurse shaving him was a 'no nonsense' type. Different nurses visit each time and some we are starting to recognise. The ones who have visited before have started to park down in the village square and walk up the lane rather than attempt to navigate the perilous drive and the killer ditch.
Mum was invited to a friend's for coffee and i convinced her to go. I kept on top of work from the armchair near Dad's bed while he listened to the radio and watched some television. The pharmacy finally got hold of Dad's medicines in liquid form today, so Mum collected them. These will be easier for Dad to take than the pills. We now have to work out and write down the equivalent amounts to make sure we get the dose of each correct.

Best laid plans

With so many people around but for a limited time, i asked my Aunt to take Mum out for lunch today while they went to the shops, to give Mum a break. I assured them both that i could hold the fort here and put Grandma to work as necessary. Sadly this brilliant plan wasn't quite to be. Dad's GP called and suggested he would pop round as well as a community nurse. Mum felt she'd rather be present to see what each had to say, so only went to the shops much later in the end, well beyond lunchtime.
The doctor reassured us that the advice of the Macmillan system was correct. For a period early last week when Dad seemed to dip, there was a debate where the Macmillan advice had been to reduce Dad's steroids further but the specialist had advised increasing them. Mum wasn't sure who to believe. The doctor today confirmed our belief that the specialist did that in the hopes Dad would be restored significantly again with a higher dose. Sadly this hasn't happened so the next step will be the reduction again of Dad's steroids. The nurse seemed only to have came to introduce herself and enjoyed a cup of tea.
Dad slept in the afternoon while i kept on top of work email, my Uncle read the paper and Grandma leafed through some books. Mum and my Aunt returned home with a two-way baby radio which was promptly assembled and played with. Mum is worried that she won't hear if something happens in the night, now that Dad sleeps downstairs. So now, instead of complaining about Dad's snoring, she plans to go to bed eagerly listening for it.
We are getting used to nursing teams coming and going throughout the day. The morning session seems to be around 9am and the evening visit around 7pm. We have requested the evening visit happens earlier though as 7pm has proved to be the time we all get hungry. The nurses are all very friendly but Dad is still getting used to all these relative strangers messing with him. Some of them cope better with Dad's friendly resistance than others.

Screwdriver anyone?

A few days ago Dad asked Mum to go and get the screwdriver from his dressing gown pocket. She was fairly sure there wouldn't be one but went to check and there was no screwdriver or anything else in fact. It didn't seem to matter. Earlier today Dad surprised Mum when he was lying in bed and asked her again for a screwdriver. She asked what he wanted it for and he pointed at the television. My first thought when she told me was that it was alarming if Dad suddenly wanted to take a screwdriver to the television in an effort to repair it. Fortunately Mum was a bit quicker thinking and after a quick scramble about found and  gave Dad the television remote control which he seemed happy with. Of all the possible words, isn't it strange that 'screwdriver' is the first to pop into his head?
Dad's friends came to visit today as planned and he enjoyed seeing them. They had to come to his bedside though as he didn't get up today. Mum says he seems slightly less coherent each day but then shows moments of his old self. Apparently yesterday when the doctor asked if he knew where he was, Dad quickly replied "Ightham" with a look on his face that said 'if you don't know where you have come to see me, then what use are you?'

Scan news

This week Dad had a full body scan, the first since September and the completion of his radiotherapy. We have noticed over the past fortnight that he is increasingly tired, confused and headaches have returned, so feared the worst, but in fact although it revealed that the metastasis on his left side is growing (two months ago it was 4cm and it is now 6cm) it also showed that the whole brain radiotherapy has slightly reduced the size of the metastases in his brain. The oncologist, recognising the return of symptoms, has increased Dad's steroid dose again. He is now on 4mg of dexamethasone a day (originally put on 16mg a day back in August and since weaned down to 2mg a day week by week) This should reduce the swelling surrounding each metastasis in his brain, reducing the pressure on his brain and hopefully the symptoms. We were told Dad is not well enough for an operation  but he will be given radiotherapy for the metastasis on his left side.
Scans aside, Mum and Dad are doing well for cake at the moment, as their neighbour is kindly providing a regular supply of home-baked goodies. Dad has always had a sweet tooth, so he is very much enjoying this. He even has enough appetite to wolf down several at a time! Some golfing buddies came round and my cousin visited too with his girlfriend. Dad enjoys seeing people but gets tired quickly at the moment and zones-out a bit during conversations. Having said that, he was cheerful at lunch out on Saturday and when asked how the doctor's visit was he replied "He was very well thankyou!"