Seized

Just as i posted that last entry Dad had another small seizure. We haven't seen him have any seizures since he had three in 24 hours about ten days ago, despite watching him like hawks since. During the seizure his head stayed firmly to the left this time, but his jaw twitched, opening and closing his mouth, as he stared straight ahead. He fell asleep straight away and i have let him rest and waited a little while before trying to rouse him from sleep just enough to give him another dose of morphine, but he is so deeply asleep that i cannot wake him even pinching his earlobe, so i will head to bed.

Goodnight is the hardest word

Night-time is hard. I spend all day every day with Dad at the moment and i find it really hard to say Goodnight to him. Even though he squeezes my fingers in his hand and tells me goodnight too. I don't like leaving him downstairs in the dark all alone, especially now he is so weak, skinny and confused. Worse still are the mornings. I know it is very possible sometime soon that i will go to wake him in the morning and not be able to.